Do Children Know When You’re In the Mood
and NEED Them to Go To Sleep?

Of course, if you have kids, you know the answer to this question is yes. But what can you do about it?

We’ve all had days when we are ‘in the mood,’ making special effort to ensure our lover is well aware of the fact through whatever enticing means we know are sure fire. And then, as the kids bedtime approaches, we start to get anxious. We try in rush through bedtime stories and tooth brushing, and tuck the kids in with a hasty kiss and encourage them to go to sleep fast. And then 2 minutes after we leave, we hear a faint voice calling from the bedroom…

‘Mom…?’

‘Yes, sweetie,’ we reply, trying not to sound frustrated.

‘Can I have a drink of water?’

‘Yep, I’ll be right there.’

We bring the water in, and as our little bundle of joy takes a sip, we tell them to ‘get to sleep, no more calling me, okay.’

And then, right as we snuggle next to our man to wait ’til we know they’re asleep for sure…

‘Dad…?’

‘What now, sweetie,’ Dad replies as we grumble with frustration.

‘Can you just turn the hall light on, that’s all.’

‘O’kay, now please, go to sleep.’

Again, we cuddle up next to our love, both of us patiently waiting for that sound of heavy breathing and lack of movement that are positive indicators of sleeping children.

And then….

You know. I know you know. It happens to all of us. Although there are no sure fire answers for this situation, I have three strategies for dealing with the kiddies when they are not what is on your mind. These are not ‘tips from experts’, but simply things that I, as a mom, have discovered through experience, and I want to share for the greater good I hope they work for you.

1. Don’t Rush ‘em to bed
I think we all know this is a bad idea, and sometimes, we do it without even trying. And, even when consciously make an effort not to rush, they sense something’s up. This is why prolonging the bedtime rituals is a good thing…it throws the kids off. Read an extra story, give them five more minutes before lights out, lay with them for 15 minutes instead of the usual 10, any little extra will work. Even though they may still have a sixth sense that something is up, they’ll enjoy the extra attention and be more likely to fall asleep peacefully (and quickly).

2. Focus all your attention on them
This should go without saying, but you don’t want to over do it. It’s a delicate balance, however we all know our kids well enough that we should be able to pull it off.

For me, if I snuggle in bed and read a bunch of stories with my 6 year old daughter, then lay with her for 15 minutes, we’re good to go. Then, go chat with my 10 year old son and play a game of Qwitch and he’s off to his room to read for 1/2 hour. This is where it can get tricky though, because my son does not like to stop reading. However, if I stay on top of it, and go and chat with him right when his time is up for about 5 minutes, he’ll go off to sleep right away. Then, my evening is free, but there’s one more thing, because you don’t want them awake, and that takes us to step number 3.

3. Assume they are awake, ‘til you know they’re not, then wait 10 more minutes.
My kids both are heavy breathing sleepers, so it’s pretty easy to know when they’re asleep. But, even when I’m sure, I wait 10 more minutes, sometimes I even make a fake trip into their bedrooms to pretend put something away, just to see if they move or react. If there is movement of any kind, I wait 5 to 10 more minutes.

You’ll have to judge based on your own experience, but once you are assured they’re all asleep, let the festivities begin.

Now for me, as a single mom who’s boyfriend does not stay over when the kids are there, this ritual is one that usual happens on holidays that require hiding or distributing things, or if I need to get some uninterrupted work done. I can assure you, however, I have never been caught and as long as I follow these steps, I’m assured an evening of peace for whatever purpose you have.

Now, for those of you who will be partaking in naughty fun once the kiddies are asleep, two things: Make sure you lock the door (just in case); and have fun!