Bella Out Loud » Exploration

The Sunday Spank: Fun on a Budget

Bella — Mon, 20 Apr 2009 05:17:33 +0000

During these times that we find ourselves in, many of us are tightening our budgets. Activities that we do as families are being minimized or changed for cheaper options–this goes for the ‘Adult Alone Time’ as well. Date nights and/or sexy evenings require some creativity to keep costs down.

The good news is, sex is free, and it’s fun! Plus, although new lingerie, toys and props are nice additions, there are plenty of things around the house that you can use to liven up any evening. Following are a few ideas I’ve put together and categorized by ‘type.’ I know there are plenty more, the important thing is to be creative to keep that budget in-line while still keeping things in the bedroom hot

Romance/Mood Setting Items:

Candles – Most everyone has at least one candle around the house, but most likely more. Just gather ‘em all together and create your own candle-lit love den.
Lotion – I own like 5+ different kinds of scented lotions, and I think most women do. Rubbing each other down is a great way to get in some touch time.
Baby Oil – If you have kids, you inevitably have a bottle of this laying around. It makes a nice massage oil.
Flowers – For those of you with a garden in bloom, bundle up some flowers in a vase and add them to the aforementioned, candle-lite love den.
Bubble Bath – If you happen to be lucky enough to have a bathtub that holds two comfortably, fill ‘er up and soak together. Otherwise pamper your lover with a nice hot bath followed-by a relaxing massage.

Sexy Stuff:

Lingerie – whatever you already have is still just as hat as when you first got it, so make sure to use those sexy pieces in your collection.
His Clothes – Does he have a neck-tie, or a button down shirt? Or maybe jacket? If you wear something of his with nothing underneath…well you get the idea.
Apron – Of course this has a hint of the whole french maid thing, but if you have an apron, why not put it to use for more than cooking?
Heels – If you’ve got some sexy heels, remember they’re good for bedroom use as well. Pair them with lingerie, or his neck-time, or that apron…or nothing

Sexy Food:

Whip Cream – Yeah, yeah, I know, but it is sexy, and it’s nice to pair as a dip of you’re going to use it to feed to your lover (see, you though I was going to suggest eating it off them…well you could do that too).
Chocolate – Chocolate, to me, is heavenly and those who feed it to me deserve special attention, perhaps your mate feels the same way?
Fruit – chocolate covered strawberries come to mind, perhaps with whip cream. Or grapes. Feeding each other sexy food (and sipping on wine) is a nice way to begin romantic alone time.
Ice – Ice is best for use during the summer (for those of us in cooler climates). Running a cool cube across your lover body is a sexy way to cool them down.

For those who like Restraints:

Neck ties – After making your entrance in nothing but his neck tie, put it to use. A tie works well to tie arms together or to bedposts.
Scarves – Scarves look pretty and, just like a neck tie, work wonderfully to tie things together. They also serve well as blindfolds.
Belts – A great multitasker (see ‘For those who like Spanking’).
Dish Towels – I’d pair one of those white linen, embroidered dish towels with an apron for a complete cooking theme–they work as blindfolds or as ties. You could even incorporate food–a blindfolded taste test, or maybe tie your lovers arms behind their back and feed them chocolate covered strawberries.

For those who like Spanking:

Belts – Leather belts are always great for supplying that spine-tingling sting that some of us love.
Wooden Spoon – Another possible addition to that kitchen theme
Brush – A perfect paddle-like tool that provides lots of control for the spanker, and lots of sparks for the spankee.

Remember, sex is one important element that helps couples keep the connection, allowing their relationship to grow together. Despite the economy, we have to find ways to get that alone time we need, even on a budget.

I encourage all of you to get creative and have some fun exploring romantic, sexy ideas that cost little to nothing.

The Sunday Spank: Candles & Leather & Velcro, Oh My

Bella — Sun, 12 Apr 2009 05:52:45 +0000

This week for The Sunday Spank I’m going to share my opinions on three ’sexual enhancement’ aids that I recently had the pleasure of trying.

Suntouched Edible Massage Candle
I realize that some of us prefer to stay on the milder side of things when it comes to exploration in the bedroom, so the first item I’d like to share is the Suntouched edible massage candle. I know the the thought of edible wax sounds a bit odd, but when it said it could be ‘massaged in’ and that it ‘makes a great moisturizer’, I had to try it. I got the watermelon and the scent even unlit, is delicious. Once lit and melty, the fun begins. It does come with a little spoon to assist with drizzling, but we chose to drizzle straight from the container. For me, the temperature was perfect, right from the candle, but if you’re super sensitive to heat, go with the spoon or have your partner rub it in their hands first. This candle is not wax-like at all. If your expecting a standard candle that hardens once it touches the skin, that is not what you get; it’s more like a thick massage oil/cream. It works well for massaging, not loosing it’s viscosity, but it isn’t oily either. Once it soaks in, it really is a nice moisturizer. As far as taste, it has none, the smell is great, but the taste, ‘eh’ is all I can say.

Overall I give it a thumbs up, it’s a great way to spice up a massage.

Rainbow Nights Paddle
Next, the Rainbow nights paddle. It’s black leather with a cool embroidered pattern on one side and is visually, very appealing. It’s easy to handle and the spankings provided are the perfect sting, ranging from a little spark to an electrifying slap– the spanker can easily control the force, providing as much or as little as required. If your an entry level spanker, or more advanced, this paddle is non-intimidating and serves its purpose beautifully.

I give it another thumbs up, as a nice addition to any spanking connoisseurs collection.

Thigh and Wrist Cuff Set
We’ll close out the reviews with a nice little restraint. This Thigh and Wrist Cuff Set was lots of fun and was very comfortable. The neoprene was durable and the velcro was strong. They are adjustable, which worked well for my curvaceous thighs. The clips that attached the cuff part to the thigh part did there job well, however, I had more freedom of movement than I expected. I couldn’t reach up, but I could easily reach myself . I also like that because they are not permanently attached together, each of the pieces could be used separately with other accessories.

If your looking for good multi-use restraints, and aren’t concerned with the looseness of the range of movement, this is a great set. Another thumbs up here.

I purchased each of these fun toys at EdenFantasys adult toys store. They provide a wide variety of toys and accessories from mild to wild, as well as lots of great information. When you’re ready to try these or any other toys to enhance your sex life, I encourange you to check ‘em out.

Bedroom Experimentation: Fun or Scary?

Bella — Sat, 11 Apr 2009 04:10:16 +0000

Last week I was in the final session of a training to help me better define the market I aim to serve and my goals for this site. We were going over our mission statements that had been assigned the previous week and during my time, I shared my first draft plus some key areas of focus, which in this version, included ‘Exploration and Experimentation’. Now, exploration and experimentation in the bedroom are perfectly normal and a welcome part of my sex life, and I encourage other women, particularly moms, to follow suit. A healthy sex life is good for you emotionally and physically. It helps strengthen bonds with your partner and makes you feel great overall.

One of the women in the group got me thinking, however, when she stated that ‘experimentation’ sounded scary to her, something she wouldn’t want to do. Perhaps it’s just because she really isn’t a part of the market I aim to serve or maybe the word ‘experimentation’ conjures up images of test tubes with Dr’s in white coats and restraints (which honestly, might be an interesting little role play, put I digress). Needless to say, the word ‘experimentation’ or any derivative thereof is not in my final draft–I’ve decided that ‘Explore’ would serve as a sole replacement rather than a partner in the statement. Here it is:

Because Bella Out Loud knows that Moms have sex too, we are dedicated to helping them keep their relationship spicy by providing information, resources and tools that support them as they explore and have fun with sex while strengthening the bond with their partner.

That pretty well sums up my mission for this site. I hope you all can clearly see why BellaOutLoud is here. I’m not here to scare anyone, but I’m am fairly liberal in my tips and advice. I’m here to help you spice it up and strengthen bonds with your lover, knowing full well that you have kids, a home and most likely a job to take care of too.

Anyway, I’ve gone on long enough about my mission to help moms have hot sex lives. BUT, I’m working on my focused goals for the year to support this mission, so keep your eyes open.

If you have any thoughts or questions, please post ‘em in a comment.

And, I encourage everyone to answer a few questions to help me make sure I’m giving you what you want.

Thanks!